Changed Priorities

Life has a funny way of changing priorities, doesn't it? Three years ago, my priorities were solely focused on work, school, and preparing to get married. It overwhelms me to think about the multitude of changes that have occurred these past few years.

I am a stay-at-home momma to a very ornery yet loving and curious toddler. YES!! My beautiful little baby boy will be two in less than a month, and my mind is racing trying to find ways to slow time down. I never really believed my parents (or anyone else) when I was told, "The time will just FLY by when you have a child."

I was blissfully oblivious, and quite frankly, I want that blissful oblivion back!

However, I am constantly blown away by all that my son continues to accomplish every single day. I look forward to how he will continue to grow and thrive, and I cannot wait to see how he is going to continue to change the world and others just by simply being him.

Along with the stay-at-home momma gig I've got going on, I am actively searching for a new school to go to to get my DBA. I should actually be quite tired of school, but I'm going stir crazy. It's a constant yearning to want to learn more and perfect and build upon what I already know. Oh, the constant stress and deadlines of papers and projects will most likely be something I pray to be over soon, but at the end of the day, that stress, those projects, and the constant internal dialog I have to push myself is something I miss. 

I am still working on my MS-related book (though it seems as it will never be completed or good enough). Despite the roadblocks when writing, I still have an unwavering desire to tell my story to the world and help someone with the journey I've traveled. I have definitely missed writing in this blog, but it seems as though there are not enough hours in the day to devote to something I love to do (changed priorities, right?). For my readers, know that I have not forgotten about you, and know that I am always wanting to write something to help you through your day and struggles. Through my absence, do not think that I am forgetting the struggles and adversities that we have all faced. If anything, I am ensuring that additional circumstances in my life will be eventually heard so that others continue to feel empowered.

With this said, my MS has been relatively calm (knock on wood). I do still have my bad days, but they are infrequent. When the bad days occur, they aren't as bad as I remember them being. It still blows my mind that all of this is happening without the assistance of medication for MS. It's been nearly five years since any form of MS therapy was voluntarily stopped, and I wouldn't change my decision for the world. 

Understand that every person with MS is different. Their MS journey is different, so what is working for me may not work for someone else. It is my hope that you empower yourself with the knowledge and resources necessary to live the best life that you can live despite having MS. You are so much more than a diagnosis, and at the end of the day, YOU embark on a journey that was created for you and you alone. No matter your journey, no matter how you approach your journey, I am still here fighting for and with you.

I am starting the process of getting back into the workforce (I knew I wouldn't be gone for long). The company I am currently interviewing with is one in which I have an immense amount of respect and admiration for. During the initial interview process, I was asked why I do the things I do within the volunteering scope of my life and why I devote that time to someone or something who, ultimately, cannot give me anything in return. 

I've been asked questions similar to the one above, but this one spoke to me. This one stayed with me months after it was initially asked. Why?

When I am gone from this world, I do not want to be remembered for what I had, the amount of money I had (although, let's be honest here, that's nice), the lifestyle I lived, or the way I dressed. 

No. No. No. 

I want to be remembered for my character and the way I made people feel. At the end of the day, if I am able to change one person's life, help one person through anything, show one person that they do matter in this world, or put a smile on someone's face then I have done a pretty good job. 

This is why I write this blog. I want you, my readers, to hear my story and feel empowered. I want you to know that you can do anything you set your mind to with the right amount of determination and perseverance. I want you to know that no one or no thing will ever stand in your way (that's right, this includes MS). I want you to know that your fight is my fight. I want you to know that your voice will always be heard. I want you to know that I care deeply about your journey. I want you to know that it is my life's goal to change your life in a positive way. 

So, through this rambling, through my absence because, well, life, and through my journey, know that I am still here, standing right beside you, fighting for the same things you are fighting for because you may have MS, but MS does not have you.